Should i hyphen my name

But what if you still want to honor your union and your new family's roots? How do you decide which moniker to take if you're torn between the two? In all these cases and many more, the perfect solution may be a hyphenated last name, aka using two last names postwedding instead of just one. A hyphenated last name is just what it sounds like: your and your partner's last names, connected with—you guessed it—a hyphen. Oftentimes, hyphenated last names are described as a merge of a woman's "maiden" and "married" names her prewedding surname and her spouse's surname.

But this name change option definitely isn't gender-exclusive. Either or both! Or, more specifically, if you hyphenate two last names, which one is your legal name postwedding? The answers are yes and both, so long as you've undergone the legal name change process using the hyphenated surname—more on that below.

Just keep in mind that once you opt to hyphenate, you have to stick with it, as all formal documents and situations requiring exact identity such as airport customs, job applications, tax filings, etc. You can't hyphenate and then flip-flop between your original name and your partner's name when it comes to official paperwork. You can't drop the hyphen or switch the order of the two last names either.

All that said, some people do use just one or the other in casual settings, like when they're making restaurant reservations. That way, they avoid having to spell out both hyphenated names over the phone. The biggest advantage of hyphenated last names is the absence of having to choose between two last names. It allows you to retain your identity while still legally adopting your partner's moniker.

However, there are some drawbacks to hyphenating. If you become a parent and one partner has a hyphenated last name while the other doesn't, you may have a different last name than your children. Believe it or not, there could also be technical difficulties. Some online forms may not correctly read or register your name think: counting the hyphen as an invalid "special character".

And according to Jake Wolff, the founder of popular name change service HitchSwitch , character limits come into play too. If your two last names are really long combined, they may not fit and you could actually have to choose a different surname option!

Even if they do fit on your IDs, you may run into future roadblocks writing them out in full. Once the wedding is over and you're ready to adopt a hyphenated last name, you'll need your marriage certificate to initiate the change. The document lets you legally take your partner's surname or a combination of your two last names after marriage.

In some states, the marriage license application asks soonlyweds to declare their married name before the wedding day. Pay close attention, because if yours does and you don't, you'll have to petition the court for a name change instead which is a much more involved—and usually costly—process. In other states, the application asks for just your original names. In that case, you have until after the wedding to decide on a course of action.

Check out The Knot's step-by-step guide to changing your last name. Psst … we also have how-to guides by state. There's also the option of a name change service like HitchSwitch , which really cuts down on the research and paperwork you have to do. The team has seriously impressive expertise in all sorts of name change situations, so you can go to them with any specific questions you may have about how to hyphenate your last name.

The company offers three different packages at pretty reasonable prices, so you can be as involved or blissfully uninvolved! When it comes to hyphenated last names, which goes first?

Generally, there are no set rules or etiquette when it comes to deciding exactly how your hyphenated last name will read.

You can go the "traditional" route and list your "maiden" name first, or you could choose to list your new last name first, followed by your original last name. Some couples decide to have both partners change to the hyphenated last name, as a show of unity and equality. But can you have two last names while your partner only has one? Explaining the change to others was more of a challenge—we definitely ruffled some feathers. Once the legal name change was complete, most of the opposition quieted down.

It took us a couple of years to feel comfortable being so unconventional, but like most things related to parenting, confidence takes time. Read more: I changed my name for the sake of my kids—and I regret it Whoa! Parents invented over 1, new baby names in Parenting I hyphenated my kid's last name—four years later, I changed my mind Turns out a having a hyphenated name is a real pain.

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When we went to get our marriage license a few days before the wedding, my soon-to-be-husband and I discovered that in our state, we were required to declare any name changes on the license, which we needed that day; if I waited until after the wedding to decide, I would have had to go through the standard and fairly involved court process of a legal name change if I wanted to take his name or hyphenate.

Long story short, after all of my indecisive dillydallying, I had to make a quick decision right then, so I bit the bullet and put the two names together, a hyphen in the middle. There are things I love about my new name, but I was right to be worried about the practical implications of having a very long 19 characters! If either my husband or I had had a one-syllable name, I imagine my experience would be a bit different. That was only the beginning.

I have one, which means that the hyphen is actually part of my legal name. Computers and, frankly, a lot of the people who use them often have trouble with the hyphen and with the fact that I have a multipart name.